Prosper in Love Health and Wealth
Forgiving is an important step on your good to great journey. In my book From Good to Great I address why forgiving is important and why it is a difficult step to take. But it is necessary or you will be stuck and going in circles until you can get past this critical juncture.
In order to forgive others we have one important person in our life that we need to forgive first. We need to forgive ourselves. You may be thinking why do you need to forgive yourself, or you may be thinking, “I haven’t done anything wrong to hurt others. I was the one that was hurt.” We are hurt by others that is true. The first thing we must do is take responsibility. Not for the things that people did to hurt us, but for our journey back to wholeness. Forgiving oneself is extremely important to the healing process of our soul.
Often we don’t think that we need to forgive ourselves first. We tend to focus more on those that hurt us. If we were cheated, betrayed or lied to or physically abused in some form we tend to focus on the person or perpetrators that cause the hurt, pain, or suffering. But deep down inside we are blaming ourselves for something. Perhaps you think that you were to blame for getting into the situation or worse it was deserved because you were not a good person and needed to be punished.
Whatever the reason, you are holding yourself responsible and maybe you think that you shouldn’t be living because of this. It is this catch 22 that often keeps a person bound to their failures and even pain and suffering. We think we deserve it and we think that the other person needs to be held accountable. Which is it? Most likely both. We need to forgive ourselves and the ones who hurt us.
To allow yourself to get from good to great you need to forgive yourself first and then it will be easier to forgive the other person. Even in the most terrible of situations, like a child who was hurt by an adult or sexually abused. They feel a lot of guilt and shame and many times they believe that they deserved it or was somehow responsible because they cannot understand why someone would do this to them. It is sometimes easier to forgive others, because to forgive yourself may mean that you have to face the fact that you are in pain and you don’t want to face that and you certainly don’t want to blame yourself for what happened. Yes it is hard. There is no denying that but in order to heal there is some pain that you need to submit yourself to.
Let’s get started and begin the healing process. Choose to forgive yourself and ask yourself why you feel that you are responsible. Start to search your soul for the areas of pain, a good start is to tune in to your body and feel any tightness or pain. Or think of situations in which you tense up or feel tightness in your shoulder, chest or stomach. These are good places to start. Again I like to tap to release the energy blocks as we go through this emotional response to forgiving ourselves.
Tapping exercise: I choose to forgive myself, I choose to forgive myself for the mistakes, transgressions, or iniquities that I have made, I also feel embarrassed, ashamed, or guilty. I choose to release these emotions related to this unforgiveness. I deeply and completely forgive myself.
If you are unfamiliar with EFT, you can learn more about it from Nick Ortner, at thetappingsolution.com website he has a simple and easy lesson on his website. They also have great material and proof on why EFT works.